Political Jokes From David Letterman

"President Obama is in Russia. And we know this because Sarah Palin says she can see him from her house." --David Letterman

"There was a surprising announcement over the weekend. Governor of Alaska Sarah Palin is leaving office. She's stepping down. Something I said?" --David Letterman, referring to his feud with Palin

"But a lot of public figures do this. And I've tried to do it. Doesn't work. You blame the media. When you have trouble, you blame the media. And today, as a matter of fact, she was up in a helicopter, shooting Wolf Blitzer." --David Letterman

"But I was talking to a lady here in the audience who's from Alaska. And we were wondering about this. How does a thing like this work? Because she steps down and no longer the governor of Alaska. And we figured it out, the title now is -- Miss Congeniality steps up, I think, -- is now the governor of Alaska. I think so." --David Letterman

"Everybody have a nice, happy Fourth of July? We took Mom to see the fireworks. I thought it was going to be a lot of fun. Every time, a big one goes off, my mom screams, 'It's North Korea! It's North Korea! Run!'" --David Letterman

"How about that North Korea? Over the weekend, launched seven missiles, and Joe Biden, the Vice President, says that they're just trying to get attention. Well, that should calm things down." --David Letterman

"Mark Sanford described his girlfriend as his 'soulmate.' And I thought, well, if there is one thing that beautiful women love, it's a fiscal conservative, am I right?" --David Letterman

"But Governor Mark Sanford didn't really enjoy this year's Fourth of July. He left his favorite firecracker in Argentina." --David Letterman

"Well, ladies and gentlemen, here's something very exciting. President Obama is in Russia although he told his staff he was hiking on the Appalachian Trail." --David Letterman

"But he's over there. He's talking about getting some major concessions from the Russians. And Russia has agreed -- now, this is surprising -- they agreed now to produce fewer nuclear warheads and more hot tennis babes." --David Letterman
Follow On Twitter----Premium Domain Names----Funny Political Cartoons