Thursday, November 8, 2012

Funny Election Jokes by Jay Leno

"Congratulations to President Obama on being re-elected president of the United States. Turns out it is not all bad news for the Republicans. It seems that depression is covered by Obamacare." –Jay Leno

 "Exit polls show that President Obama did well with women, beating Romney by 11 binders." –Jay Leno

 "Some more good news – the president announced today he is not going to raise taxes on the entire 1 percent, just Donald Trump." –Jay Leno

 "Trump is not giving up. When it was announced that President Obama easily won the Electoral College, Trump demanded to see Obama's Electoral College records." –Jay Leno

 "Donald Trump is starting to lose it. At one point last night on Twitter, he called for revolution since Obama won. The man's a billionaire who owns golf courses, okay. You don't call for revolution. Billionaires are the first ones beheaded during a revolution." –Jay Leno

 "Vice President Joe Biden said now that the election is over, he's going to take a vacation. He's been vice president for four years. That is a vacation!" –Jay Leno

 "In a stage show Madonna urged her audience to vote for President Obama. You know what' s unbelievable? Madonna has been right in every election since Calvin Coolidge." –Jay Leno

 "This morning the stock met plunged over 300 points. You know why? Romney pulled his money out." –Jay Leno

 "Actually I thought Mitt Romney was very gracious last night. He gave a very touching concession speech. And the good news for Romney is that he can still run for president of the Cayman Islands." –Jay Leno