John Boehner Jokes

It is cold down in Washington, D.C. They had to use an ice scraper on John Boehner's face to get the tears off, it was so cold." —David Letterman

"This guy is an ad for Paxil." —Bill Maher on John Boehner crying at a ceremony recognizing the 50th anniversary of John F. Kennedy's inauguration

"Next week Boehner will be sitting behind Obama at the State of the Union address. I think Obama should purposely try to embarrass him by telling the story of 'Old Yeller.' The state of our Union is strong, but not so good for one special dog.'" —Bill Maher

"John Boehner chose a huge gavel. I think somebody’s compensating for his small government." –Stephen Colbert

"In his first speech as Speaker, Boehner thanked his loved ones – tobacco lobbyists, the oil companies, the CEOs." –Jay Leno

"How about the new Speaker of the House, John Boehner. Have you seen this guy's enormous gavel. I'm telling you, if in four hours, that gavel is still that size, he's got to call a doctor." –David Letterman

"John Boehner -- doesn't he look like every guy you've ever seen at a hotel bar? He looks like the kind of guy who licks his thumb when he counts his money." –David Letterman