David Letterman's Funny Political Jokes

"Hot today in New York City. So hot today that Sarah Palin had to wear sunblock for her rambling press conference." --David Letterman

"There is a new Osama bin Laden tape. And people say, 'Well, is it a new tape?' Yes. They verified it, it's a new audiotape because in it, he says he doesn't think that 'Bruno' is as funny as 'Borat.'" --David Letterman

"They began the confirmation hearings down in Washington for a new Supreme Court justice, Sonia Sotomayor. Anybody see it? Something always goes haywire. The hearings for the confirmation were delayed until security could quiet down all of the Chuck Schumer groupies." --David Letterman

"But Sonia Sotomayor is in for a couple hours of intense grilling, you know, like me when I get home late." --David Letterman

"But if you're interested in the confirmation hearings, you can watch them live on C-SPAN Dos." --David Letterman

"Beautiful weather here in New York City. Sunny, beautiful, sunny, clear day. It was so bright and sunny, you could even see what Dick Cheney was up to." --David Letterman

"So now it turns out that Dick Cheney, while he was Vice President, had a private deal going with the CIA And he goes to the CIA -- and those guys are pretty good at keeping a secret -- and he goes to the CIA, and he says, 'Boys, this will just be between you and me. We're going to run our own antiterrorism program. You and me. Don't tell Congress.' Eight years this was going on. And when I heard this, I said to myself, 'Gosh, that doesn't sound like the Dick Cheney I know.'" --David Letterman

"They tried to get a hold of Cheney for comment, but his staff said, 'No, no, you can't talk to Cheney. He's taking a hike on the Appalachian Trail.'" --David Letterman

"Very secret operation, went on for eight years. Nobody knew anything about it. The only thing they knew was that it was called 'Operation Hunting Accident.'" --David Letterman

"President Obama is going to be working in the broadcast booth during the All-Star Game. Everybody says, 'Oh, that's cute.' But let me tell you something. You know the economy is bad when the President has to take a second gig." --David Letterman


Follow On Twitter----Premium Domain Names----Funny Political Cartoons