"Doctors say Dick Cheney may need a heart transplant, but Cheney isn’t worried. He’s already picked out a hunting buddy." –David Letterman
"Dick Cheney predicts that President Obama will only last one term. This is coming from the same guy that predicted weapons of mass destruction in Iraq." –David Letterman
"President Hu Jintao from China is visiting the United States. Ahead of the big state dinner, President Obama went to Hu's hotel and slipped a menu under the door." –David Letterman
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