"'Twas the night before Election Day and all through the house, everyone was shouting crap at each other." –Craig Ferguson
"Republicans are saying, 'It's time for a change.' And Democrats are saying, 'Stay the course.' And Charlie Sheen is saying, 'Where are my pants?'" –Craig Ferguson
"I don't know what Christine O'Donnell stands for, but I'm a late night talk show host, I need her." –Craig Ferguson
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